The plan was to be sitting here, cup of peppermint tea in hand, merrily typing away to tell you how I’d hit my sub-50 10k target a couple of weeks ago.
The cup of tea is here.
The typing is not so merry. Have you tried typing with your wrist in a splint? (Another bike fail).
My story is not one of success.
Reader, I failed.
Now, none of this “don’t be silly, you didn’t fail” nonsense. I failed. I aimed to run a sub-50, and I didn’t.
Not only that – and this is so incredibly painful to write, and also the reason I’ve left it so long to write this post – I didn’t finish the race. A DNF. In a 10k. I finished a marathon, but threw in the towel over 6 miles.
I was feeling good going into it. Training hadn’t been perfect, but I had run 7k at target pace the previous week, so was confident I could do it.
I set off too fast. I always do. And whilst that’s okay for a 5k, I knew I would be pushing myself to keep the pace for the whole 10k so even a bit too fast was TOO fast. By 4k I was starting to struggle, and at 5k I could have kicked myself when I stopped to walk. I picked up to a run again shortly after, but the damage was done. I knew I had lost the pace, and once you’ve walked once it’s very hard not to again. By 7.5k the race was lost to me. Sub-50 was well and truly out the window and I’d run such a bad race that I told myself I didn’t deserve the medal. Having slowed to a walk yet again, I took off my number and withdrew myself from the race.
Yep, I’d thrown my toys well and truly out of the pram. I went back to the race village and made a sharp exit.
What went wrong?
Aside from pacing issues, I could make any number of excuses about why the race went so wrong for me. Not enough long runs in training (sorry coach), a sore hip, being ill the week before, an undulating course… but the fact is, I just couldn’t do it on the day.
I’ve stopped catastrophising over it so much now, and realised that it was just that – I couldn’t do it on THAT day. I’ll be able to do it one day, and I will keep trying. My body is capable of it, and my mind is capable of believing. So it’s not game over just yet.
So what’s next, I’m sure you’re dying to ask. Well, the MK Winter Half is my next race – which is probably my favourite local race – I had a blast last year. I don’t really have a time goal in mind, although I’ve run my previous three HMs in 1.58, 1,55 (last year’s Winter Half) & 1.54 so if I’m being honest with myself I’d be happy with anything 1.53 or below. I do really want to enjoy it though, and just run a GOOD race; I don’t want to come away with bad memories of what is a happy race for me. So I’ll be training hard and seeing where that takes me. If that’s a PB, happy days.
And after that, well, did somebody mention the Loch Ness Marathon…?